I can feel your desperation
Dear Lands’ End,
It started out well between us. I bought a few things, and yes some went back, but it didn’t mean I was angry or unhappy. I thought we were okay. I thought you were okay. I actually kind of almost liked the new catalog. Sure it was a little long on branding and short on product, and it had a lot of ease of shopping issues, and the reverse type was hard to read, and small. Okay, okay and there wasn’t enough copy to actually make a purchase, and some of the images shown didn’t seem to be sold so I had to go online to even find the price. BUT it was pretty and the grandfather was hot. (Yah, I just said that.) And then the emails started. At first I just thought it was a phase. Some inventory issues you had to work through. I thought you’d get over it and go back to being, well, you. But it got worse. And then every day, twice a day, you were begging me to come back. Offering me 50% off this product category, and 50% off that product category, and 30% off everything else. It became very clear you were desperate and needy and that’s when I started backing away.
I’ve attached your emails (below) so you can talk about them with your marketing team. They don’t make me want to take you back, even though the creative was good. Now I feel like I paid too much when we were together. The only thing you seem to be able to say is “50% off and 30% off everything else” and I just want it to stop. I thought you had more to offer than price, I thought you had depth. (I know I should unsubscribe, but if it goes to 75% I could shop. I’ll feel dirty, but I’ll do it.)
I’m sorry things aren’t working out. I miss the old you with the comfy 100% cotton tees, before you went all 10% lycra and 30% modal. I don’t know who you are anymore. Are you outdoors? Are you street wear? Are you cheap stuff I can buy at Walmart? I think it’s time to admit you have a merchandise problem and some serious discount abuse issues. I’m not trying to hurt you, I’m just being honest. 50% off emails are crack. You need to get help.
All the best,
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