Adobe is training me to be a jerk, #Adobe sucks
A few weeks back I needed to work over the weekend to catch up from a bout with the flu. No one wants to give up a weekend to work, but sometimes there just isn’t another option. And then my computer went wonky, and then InDesign crashed, and then nothing worked. I was able to get all non-Adobe products up an running with a reboot. Sadly I didn’t need them. I only needed InDesign.
No help on the weekends?
Yup, that’s when I discovered that Adobe, who posted 5.8 billion (that’s with a B) in profit last year, doesn’t feel that customers deserve help outside of normal working hours. I’m not making this up.
At first I thought, this just can’t be. I have loved Adobe for years and have been a good and loyal customer. I remember being tortured by Quark and then savoring the sweet joy of a caring, supportive and non-glitchy page layout program. They wouldn’t abandon me when I need them, would they?
Turns out, yah, they would, and they did, and then I got mad. I have to admit that pre-Trump I was better behaved, the women’s march changed me. I might have sent Adobe a terse note, and then called a friend to vent. Not this time—I hit Twitter. First tweet was just disbelief. No response. Second tweet along with #Adobe sucks and BING I got a note from Adobe saying they would help me if I messaged them privately. (I also picked up several new followers.)
So I spend the next 6 hours typing my issues into a chat box. For the record, I don’t think you could devise a less effective, more time consuming way to solve a technical issue than chat. I vacillated between wanting to drink, bang my head on the desk, meditate or some combination of all three, but I hung in there. Finally we came to the ceremonial removing of all previous versions and the time consuming uninstall/reinstall and I called it quits for the night. Next morning still no joy, but I remembered that I had mad computer skills and that it was Sunday and I was desperate, so I did some under the hood magic on my own. I almost got it fixed but needed some guidance, so back on chat, and the Adobe team sent me to the install group. I asked them if they had read the previous group’s notes and they said they didn’t need to, and then asked me what computer I was using. I resisted the urge to destroy something. I gave them the information and re-explained the problem and they said they were sorry, they couldn’t help me and I should call on Monday. In my mind, my skin turned green, my shirt shredded (modestly) as I became a she-hulk who smashed the puny computer with great satisfaction. In reality I said “Okay, but don’t get mad at me when I tweet and blog about what horrible customer service you have.” After a brief hold, it turned out that they had a program they could use to run my computer remotely and in under 10 minutes my problem was solved. I felt like Dorothy must have felt when the “good” witch Glenda says “You’ve always had the power to go home all along. Just click your heals together…” Seriously? Six hours of chat, fear, anger, my first twitter rampage, risky hacking behavior and you had a program that could drop into my computer and fix it in under 10 minutes? AAAARRRRGGGGH!!!!!!! DIE! DIE! DIE!!!
I don’t want to be a jerk. I want to treat others with compassion and courtesy. I want to show respect for the hard working people at Adobe who show up everyday and do their best. I don’t feel good about using twitter to force Adobe to help me, but just take a moment to think about what an absolutely stupid customer service decision it is not offering help on the weekends. I actually tweeted “What about freelancers and people who are earning a second income?” (I picked up 6 followers on that one.) Think about what a PR nightmare Adobe is creating by forcing customers to get so pissed off that they tweet about it and THEN offering help. I shake my head in wonder and astonishment. There is no amount of savings that makes that a long-term winning strategy.
All the best,
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